Mangraa

second-hand meetings

2010-03-10T11:34:00.000-08:00

On my phone, short post...

I got a lost ipod from the school security sale. Cheap, small, and had music on it.
I wish I had met this person, and even though they had a lot of teeny bopper top 40 on there, when I looked for some of my favourite bands, they were in there, and lots of songs by them. The Smiths, dm, pixies...
Even had The Postal Service.
The story with TPS and I is that I discovered them shortly before or after Zet and I fell through...I managed to (through potential ocd behaviour) tie a bulk of my sadness to their song "Nothing Better". It's ... Quite strange, given the lyrics, that that song entered my life when it did.
I tied a lot of the leftover (although nowhere near all) sadness to... "Baby Love Child" (?) By... I think it was Pizzicato Five.

Time to rest. Here's the lyrics from "Nothing Better", coupled with a slow, sad but somewhat uppity synth line, created a vessel for that stuff.
I willed myself to listen to it for the first time in 3 or so years... 20 seconds in, I was crying. *sigh*

"Nothing Better"
Will someone please call a surgeon
Who can crack my ribs and repair this broken heart
That your're deserting for better company?
I can't accept that it's over...
I will block the door like a goalie tending the net
In the third quarter of a tied-game rivalry

So just say how to make it right
And i swear i'll do my best to comply

Tell me am i right to think that there could be nothing better
Than making you my bride and slowly growing old together

I feel must interject here you're getting carried away feeling sorry for yourself
With these revisions and gaps in history
So let me help you remember.
I've made charts and graphs that should finally make it clear.
I've prepared a lecture on why i have to leave

So please back away and let me go
I can't my darling i love you so...

Tell me am i right to think that there could be nothing better
Than making you my bride and slowly growing old together
Don't you feed me lines about some idealistic future
Your heart won't heal right if you keep tearing out the sutures

I admit that i have made mistakes and i swear
I'll never wrong you again
You've got a lure i can't deny,
But you've had your chance so say goodbye
Say goodbye

The man, the legend, the cat

2010-01-29T19:49:00.001-08:00

For anyone wondering where my sidekick, Geoffrey (the 21 lb cat) got his name...

Meh

2010-01-22T10:00:00.001-08:00

Well, it's back... one step closer to restoring archives, which might be interesting to me in the future sometime. Blah. Maybe I'll start blogging again. Just my random crap that nobody reads or cares about for the most part, but hey, it's decent practice for papers and whatnot ... I guess.

Think I'm going to disable image galleries until I figure out what to do about that. That was the vulnerability. Now that you know, hack away. Ugh.

Hm

2010-01-22T09:55:00.000-08:00

While I agree with the anti-Chinese censorship message which popped up after visiting my (hacked) site, it's still a little annoying.

Let's see if I can get things back to "normal" ... ugh.

More random song lyrics - Frank Sinatra by Miss Kittin and the Hacker

2009-11-26T14:15:00.000-08:00

Every night with my star friends
We eat caviar and drink champagne
Sniffing in the VIP area
We talk about Frank Sinatra..
"You know Frank Sinatra?"
He's dead!
Dead.
HAHAHAHAHA!

To be famous is so nice
Suck my dick
Kiss my ass
In limousines we have sex
Every night with my famous friends
Nice...

Suck my dick
Kiss my ass
so nice . . .
VIP area. . .
Frank... Frank Sinatra

Motherfuckers are so nice
Suck my dick
Lick my ass
In the mix we have sex....
Every night with my favorite friends..

Frank.. Frank.. Frank Sinatra

Every night with my star friends
Shake your body like the dance
Stupid smiles and autographs
This is a song for France
Every night with my star friends
In Limousines we have sex.

Miss_Kittin_%26_The_Hacker_-_14_-_Frank_sinatra_2001.mp3

Dethsupport Lyrics - Dethklok

2009-11-22T10:38:00.000-08:00

Pull the plug (x8)

I drove my truck into a moving van
It was all filed up with jet fuel and
I crashed right in and explosion
Smash through the window and ripped off my
Hands

Medical team drove up and found me
Bleeding in pieces picked up off the street
Drove me into a filthy hospital
Horror experiences financially

Woke up in pain in a gown in bed
Internal hemorrhaging inside my head
I really think that I should be dead
I saw the bill and then I cry, bled

To keep me alive it was costing me
National deficit times three
There is no way to avoid this fee
Please pull the plug and kill me

It's costing too much

Pull the plug

It's costing too much

Pull the plug (x16)

Aneurism
Botulism
Epilepsy
Narcolepsy
Pull the plug

Nearsighted
Breathe lighting
Cataracts
Heart attacks
Pull the plug

Hepatitis
Bronchitis
Appendicitis
Arthritis
Pull the plug

Encephalitis
Adenitus
Mastoiditus
Capsulitus

Pull the plug now (x4)

Pay you my life instead of life support
Harvest my plasma because it's worth more
Take all my blood and my organs
Sell them to buyers over in third worlds

Burn my cadaver for some energy
Charge the patients in their misery
Such a strong quarter for the industry
Pharmaceutical fucking victory

Can't pay this price
Pull the plug
Pay with my life
Pull the plug
Say my farewell
Pull the plug
See you in Hell
I'll fucking pull the plug

Ergh

2009-09-25T06:43:00.001-07:00

Insomnia. Or something like it. 3 hours of sleep. Hoping for more.

hm

2009-09-23T09:10:00.000-07:00

Twitter seems to be my posting method of choice now.

Whatever. I don't mind my insanity, but now when it's coupled with physical pain, it is a trip to a plae I wouldn't wish upon anyone. Except maybe Hitler.

Today's song from The Smiths: What Differene Does It Make?

------

All men have secrets and here is mine
So let it be known
For we have been through hell and high tide
I think I can rely on you ...
And yet you start to recoil
Heavy words are so lightly thrown
But still I'd leap in front of a flying bullet for you

So, what difference does it make ?
So, what difference does it make ?
It makes none
But now you have gone
And you must be looking very old tonight

The devil will find work for idle hands to do
I stole and I lied, and why ?
Because you asked me to !
But now you make me feel so ashamed
Because I've only got two hands
Well, I'm still fond of you, oh-ho-oh

So, what difference does it make ?
Oh, what difference does it make ?
Oh, it makes none
But now you have gone
And your prejudice won't keep you warm tonight

Oh, the devil will find work for idle hands to do
I stole, and then I lied
Just because you asked me to
But now you know the truth about me
You won't see me anymore
Well, I'm still fond of you, oh-ho-oh

But no more apologies
No more, no more apologies
Oh, I'm too tired
I'm so sick and tired
And I'm feeling very sick and ill today
But I'm still fond of you, oh-ho-oh

Oh, my sacred one ...
Oh ...

Writ 340

2009-08-12T12:14:00.001-07:00

The writing course I took over the summer (required at USC) yielded an A grade.

Yay.

New photos

2009-07-28T20:20:00.000-07:00

Rad photos of the MC Chris show.

Also had some great quality time with the members of Le Sexoflex, a rather unique group which sounds like an even more explicit version of Peaches, if you can imagine such a thing. They even mentioned me in their little blog post about the show. I'm so flattered. Now I hafta figure out how to get to DragonCon this year, as they convinced me I should go. Between what they've said about the convention and the Skeptic crowd that will be there, I'm jonesing to go.

Just realized some of the camera photos are HUGE. Will reprocess later.

Lotsa new photos up as I finally got off my butt and processed everything.

I've been debating doing the whole Facebook photo album thing. I like having the photos here, but this site is pretty much for people who know me, or happen to come across it in random Google searches or something. Not very good for really fulfilling any narcissistic needs to put stuff in a forum which allows even MORE people to see how awesome I am and stuff (Facebook).

I'll think about it. Personally I like the fact that I can put up what I want, no size restrictions or anything.

2009-07-13T20:51:00.000-07:00

Psyc 360 grade

2009-07-02T15:29:00.000-07:00

Did well :) 489/500 possible points. Woohoo. Add another 4.0 to the GPA :)

Tehran Twitter

2009-06-24T13:48:00.001-07:00

If you have a Twitter account, set your location to Tehran and your time zone to GMT +3.30. Security forces are apparently hunting for bloggers using location/timezone searches. The more people at this location, the more of a logjam it creates for forces trying to shut down Iranians' access to the internet. Cut, paste and please pass it on to everyone you know. By the way it takes two minutes.

Travolta admitted to cops his son had a seizure disorder and was AUTISTIC

2009-06-10T14:53:00.001-07:00

I'm not happy about the kid's death or anything, it's just a bombshell for JT and his position in Scientology ....

Sucks. But ... hmmm ...

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/troll_slayer.png

2009-06-03T10:16:00.000-07:00

Mental note

2009-05-26T07:27:00.000-07:00

Possible treatise on the advancement of technology in social factors and the differences between successful integration into one's life versus replacement of existing behaviours which promote isolation and disconnection.

Hm

2009-05-25T10:38:00.000-07:00

MISSION OF PSYOP

1-5. The mission of PSYOP is to influence the behavior of foreign target audiences (TAs) to support U.S. national objectives. PSYOP accomplish this by conveying selected information and/or advising on actions that influence the emotions, motives, objective reasoning, and ultimately the behavior of foreign audiences. Behavioral change is at the root of the PSYOP mission. Although concerned with the mental processes of the TA, it is the observable modification of TA behavior that determines the mission success of PSYOP. It is this link between influence and behavior that distinguishes PSYOP from other capabilities and activities of information operations (IO) and sets it apart as a unique core capability.

1-6. As a core capability of IO, PSYOP are considered primarily to be shaping operations that create and preserve opportunities for decisive operations. PSYOP help shape both the physical and informational dimensions of the battlespace. PSYOP provide a commander the means to employ a nonlethal capability across the range of military operations from peace through conflict to war and during postconflict operations. As information delivered for effect during peacetime and conflict, PSYOP inform and influence. When properly employed, PSYOP saves lives of friendly and adversary forces, whether military or civilian. PSYOP may reduce the
adversaries’ will to fight, morale, and efficiency. PSYOP discourages aggressive actions, and creates dissidence and disaffection within their ranks, ultimately inducing surrender.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ministry:RIP

2009-05-24T22:13:00.000-07:00

I'm way out of touch with stuff I used to like. I didn't even know MINISTRY DISBANDED. They played their final show in March or something. OF 2008!

*sigh*

At least I got to see them once in their heyday. When they had chain link fence in front of the stage so beer bottles wouldn't hit them.

Ahhhhhh memories.

Book

2009-05-24T22:07:00.000-07:00

I get to help out with a textbook of sorts for a sociology professor I studied under back at UCLA :)

Heh heh .. something about experiences as an undergrad. This should be interesting.

Heh Heh Heh ... I earned it.

2009-05-24T15:56:00.000-07:00

Grade Report for SPRING 2009

Course ID	Attempted	Earned	Grades	Units	Points	Course Title
SOCI-420	4.0	4.0	A	4.0	16.00	Sociology of Violence
SOCI-351	4.0	4.0	A-	4.0	14.80	Sociology of Juvenile Delinquency and the Juvenile Justice System
SOCI-314	4.0	4.0	B	4.0	12.00	Sociological Statistics
ASTR-100	4.0	4.0	B	4.0	12.00	The Universe

Mental Civil War

2009-05-24T15:26:00.000-07:00

I find myself struggling as of late with ... finding a balance between the old and the "new" me ... The constant pain and mindfuckery which follows it doesn't help things much. But I'm a geek at heart... but I don't do or like geeky things that much any more. So I'm constantly berating myself or something. I don't know, it's quite an interesting quandry. Even more interesting is the fact that google spellcheck doesn't know the word "quandry".

Guess it's tricky for someone like me to love themsef after awhile... I'm hoping this is just a patch, a part of the "process", we'll just say. If it sounds cryptic, it's meant to be. For those who know, you know. Someone told me that some people need to always check their first decisions on anything, and I may be one of those people now. I'm not sure if I ever was in the past, but it wasn't an issue; I was happy, I was safe, I did well, etc. But now sometimes my thoughts or instinctual actions are tainted with ... hmmm.... I try not to use thesaurai ... bitterness. I wish I had a better word for it, but I don't. Perhaps I'll try to go back to my word-a-day calendars. And fuck 'em if they think I'm a geek, including my own mind, cause I am. I like to think I'm at least on the cooler side of geek, but a geek nonetheless. so ... Hm. Part of the process, eh?

3 down, 9 to go. Ech.

Astronomy

2009-05-14T15:27:00.000-07:00

Got a B in the course. I was happy just to have passed.

The course taught me not just about astronomy, but how bad my brain is at learning in any kind of regurgitative style.. not meant in a bad way, but that plus the fact that it's science (I love science, but the nuts and bolts of it en masse would always confuse me) made it frigging hard.

But I'm content.

Word.

2009-04-03T17:05:00.000-07:00

While I have been cynical and generally blah about social networking sites, twitter, etc. I have decided to use twitter and push the feeds to the sidebar. I'll maintain this main site for larger works or whatever, but hey.. may as well incorporate twitter into the game. Short, sweet, tweet.

Upswing

2009-03-29T22:27:00.001-07:00

Hopefully it is one ...

and hopefully it lasts.

Mental state switching from slow to fast.

Is nothing sacred?h

2009-02-15T09:01:00.000-08:00

*Sigh*

Someone is making a Donnie Darko sequel. Why did I hafta start the day with shitty news..?